I'm scared......

Something has been on my mind recently, and it's due to a book that I've been reading ('We need to talk about Kevin').

This book, basically, goes into an in-depth analysis of what the (possible) contributing factors could have been into a teenage boy who goes on a shooting rampage at his local school. The story is told through his Mother, in a series of letters to her absent husband. In the letters, she tries to make sense of 'Kevin' - how he came to be the way he was, and it delves into issues that none of us particulary want to address - those of parent/children relationships, and why have children in the first place?

It is freaking me out, because it's bringing all these questions to my mind: reasons to have kids, changes it brings to your life, what kind of parent you will be.

Its made me think about things that are sometimes best left buried.

Yes, I want to have kids one day - personally, I think Tim will make a fantastic Father, and I know I would do the best job I could possibly do...... however, I am wondering if we'd be having kids for the right reason?

Once you get married it is almost expected of you - as though having children and a family is some kind of natural progression, and to not do so would be to go against the natural order of things. But is that really a strong enough reason to breed?

Anyone with kids have any comments on this?