Frustration

I am feeling a little frustrated right now, and with one person in particular......

I don't usually take out my feelings regarding other people on blogs - I find it way too depressing and bitchy, but I've just had enough and need an outlet other than moaning to Tim about it (sorry Tim!). Desperate times call for desperate measures!

Anyway, I found out last Tuesday that one of my friends (lets just call her 'X' for privacy's sake) was ill. I called her up when I recieved her text and asked her if there was anything she wanted us to bring her, as she doesn't have a car and as she said she had not left the house since Sunday. She asked for some tissues and ice-cream as she had a cold (which she thought could be swine flu) and she wanted the ice-cream as it would be 'soothing' for her throat. So on the way to the gym I stopped in and dropped off ice-cream, and tissues, and told her to get in touch if there was anything else we could do, and offered to have her over at our place to stay the night so we could look after her. A said that she would be ok. I said that I would come over and see her on Wednesday night, as Wednesday night is the night that we usually hang out. I thought it might be a good idea to take her to the local health centre and get her enrolled in there so she could access the doctor (since the only medical centre she belongs to is one in town).

On Wednesday afternoon I felt myself start to get ill -runny nose, sore throat, a little fevery. I contacted X and asked her if she still wanted me to take her to the doctor, which she promptly replied 'I don't belong to the ...... medical centre, and all I need is Tamiflu'. She asked me if I could go to the pharmacy and get her some Tamiflu. I went across to the pharmacy in the hospital to enquire about Tamiflu - I was highly doubtful that they would sell it to me anyway, and I must have sounded pretty dodgy asking for it 'for a friend' (that old line!) I was told at the pharmacy that Tamiflu is only effective if you take it in the first 48 hours after becoming ill - and that if you buy it over the counter it is $80. It seemed pointless at that point to even try to buy it given that X had been ill since Sunday night and it was now Wednesday. 'She'll just have to ride it out' was the pharmacists helpful advice. I got in touch with X and told her the news and asked her if she wanted me to take her to the pharmacy. She said that she didn't think it would help so I said that I would just go home then, as I wasn't feeling too good myself.

The next day (Thursday) I stayed at home and tried to relax. I was in touch with X who reported that she was feeling 'mildly better'. That relieved me somewhat, as I had been worried about her.

The following day I was also off sick, after being sent home from work by my boss. I decided to give X a call and see how she was - I had sent her a message asking her if she wanted to come to the fruit and vege market with us on Saturday to which she replied 'I'm very sick. I haven't been out of the house all week.' I called her up and she basically laid into me for 'not coming to see her on Wednesday night like I said I would', as apparently I had said that I would take her to the doctors. This confused me to begin with because she had said she didn't want to go to the local doctors as she was not a member there. She said she was 'really disappointed in me'. I found this frankly quite bizarre, and pointed out to her that she hadn't said anything about wanting to go to the doctors and that I had been coming down with a cold that afternoon and so had just headed home when she had said she didn't want to go the local doctors or to the pharmacy.

She then went on to say that she had had trouble breathing the night before, and had considered going to the A and E. When I asked her how she had planned to get there, she said 'by taxi' - which is pretty outrageous given that we had said to contact us if there was anything she needed. It seemed bizarre that someone who is so strapped for cash would rather take a taxi to the A and E then get in touch with her so-called close friends and ask them to take her (when we had offered to help out any way we could). 'Do you want me to take you now?' I asked her, to which she replied no. There was a big uncomfortable silence on the phone and I asked her if there was anything else she needed, ie, in the way of groceries etc as she hadn't been able to get out of the house and she promptly responded that her ex boyfriend from Auckland had ordered her some through Woolworths and then said 'Thank god for J, he's been a life saver'. We descended once more into an uncomfortable silence and then she said 'See you later' and hung up.

So I don't know if it's just me, but I think that's a pretty shit way to treat someone - I had offered to take her to the doctors, the pharmacy, to stay at our place, had asked her if there was anything she needed. And why on earth would you consider taking a taxi to the A and E when friends have willingly offered to help you out? To be honest, I just find it a bit insulting. It makes me wonder why I even bother.

I'll probably come back and delete this bitchy post at some stage, but I just needed to get it off my chest -any advice would be appreciated! I mean, perhaps there is something more I should have done? I don't know..... I'm pretty sure I did all I could given the information she passed over to me at the time. Goddamn you X!!!! why do you have to make it so hard for yourself?

Is it just me or do people who expect to be let down and disappointed in others go out of their way to make sure that they are disappointed and let down, by pushing people away and making them so frustrated in them that they just give up? because it sure seems like that to me right now.